IC Inbox (Hadriel)

[casperdisaster]

"If you're gonna leave a message you gotta leave some
info too, don't just say 'call me back' because I'll think
it means someone died!"

(Text/Audio/Action/Etc)

Comments

action, after the fight with gansey

[unknowable]

[Adam doesn't immediately go looking for Noah. He goes into his room first, lays down, tosses and turns a little. He knew sleep would be elusive, but that doesn't make it any more pleasant. Finally he gets up, shakes away the cobwebs, and goes looking for Noah.

He's not angry, exactly, though there's certainly some anger involved. He just - needs to know what Noah was thinking, why he did that, why he so easily gave away a secret that wasn't is. Adam wants to be able to trust him, but he doesn't know if that's a good idea anymore.

He just needs to figure things out. So he goes looking.]

[casperdisaster]

[Noah isn't difficult to find. He's in the living room, on the couch. He's got one of the extra fluffy blankets wrapped around him to keep warm, scrolling through pictures on his phone. It's what he does when he's got nothing else to do.

He looks up as Adam approaches. He knows he's in trouble, eyes wide and sad. His voice is barely above a whisper, just loud enough for Adam to hear so that he doesn't wake Gansey and Ronan, assuming they're even sleeping.]

... Would you believe me if I said I thought that wouldn't go that badly?

[unknowable]

[The sad puppy eyes would not have kept Adam from being angry, if he had been. But he's not, so he just sighs and sits down next to Noah, resisting the urge to put his head in his hands. This is all so messed up.]

I believe you. I just think it was stupid of you to think that.

[There is only a little venom in his words when he says that.]

Knowing people's secrets is one thing. Telling them is something else. How can we trust you to know them if we don't know when you might decide they need to be told?

[casperdisaster]

[While Noah is not above using sad puppy eyes for manipulation, right now they're genuine. Noah rests his head against the back of the couch, listening quietly while Adam speaks.

It was a big risk he'd taken, one more done out of the fear of the potential damage being worse in a different scenario. He imagines right now it rather looks like he burned down the kitchen to avoid a house fire.

That's also not really a wrong way of looking at it.

Noah picks at a stray thread of the blanket around him, drawing his legs up to tuck his knees under his chin. There's no answer to Adam's question that doesn't require a leap of faith, one he can't ask of Adam, who has survived off of his suspicions. Especially not right after all this.]

You can't, really. [Noah sighs.] You never could.

[Adam possibly especially.]

I just thought... Fear brought out our deepest fears so easily, like it was nothing. And he acts like he still doesn't know how we work, too. [Noah could keep this city powered by his fear, there's so much of it sometimes. Even his happy times feel like there's an undercurrent of fear to them.] I kept thinking, what happens next? What if secrets come out and - and that was the worst thing I could think of, for him to find out from someone other than us.

12/25

[unknowable]

[Adam is best at giving practical gifts, but Noah makes it difficult. After all, what counts as a practical gift for a ghost? It's not as if Noah needs anything. But he also isn't going to give Noah nothing. So outside of his bedroom door is a notebook, taken back when Hope made gift shops all over the city. Its cover is brightly colored and glittery, which is why it caught Adam's eye, and there's a ridiculous bright blue pen with a pom pom on the end lying atop it.

On the first page, Adam has written a note: In case we have trouble finding you. Even if we can't see you, you can always leave us a note. He doesn't sign it. His handwriting is pretty distinctive.]

Later that day

[casperdisaster]

[Noah seems especially absent today. Adam's handwriting is pretty distinctive though, and so is Noah's. At some point the notebook is taken into the room when no one sees, and a little later a piece of paper torn from it shows up on Adam's bed. Noah's handwriting has 'THANK YOU' printed very neatly on the paper. Under that taking up most of the paper is a carefully drawn oak leaf in several shades of green glitter pen.]

[mintly]

[gansey, for all his ability at grand gestures, is not that great at gifts, where his friends are concerned. it's so difficult to walk the line of want and need, and what does a ghost really need? not much.

but gansey stubbornly believes that noah will come back, that he won't remain a ghost. so on his bed on christmas morning (because sometimes gansey tries to sleep in there anyway, as though the marshmallowyness will make up in any way for the lack of noah next to him) he'll find a mitten, hat and scarf set all in a completely obnoxious fairisle pattern that is so very, very gansey. pinned to it is a paper, and on the paper is nothing but a little heart, drawn in red ball point pen.]

[casperdisaster]

[Noah's particularly absent these days, the death - he's assuming that Ronan or Adam must have told Gansey about it. It's hard to be, this far away from the ley line, though around Adam it's easier. He's not quite Blue but he's very close, a power current Noah knows and is familiar with rather than running off of Blue's internal battery.

He'll come back, eventually. But it's easier this way. He just needed a breather for a little while.

He's not sure what to make of the heart, of them. His mind gets fogged if he tries to focus too hard, like a computer overheating.

Regardless, eventually the note manages to find its way back to Gansey's room, turned over, folded in half, with 'THANK YOU' written in Noah's neat handwriting in the pen Adam gave him left on Gansey's bed.]

[whichend]

[ Arya meant what she said about helping him remember. She doesn't know what his sisters were like, but she knows quite a bit about sisters in general, and what girls her age are supposed to like. She leaves Noah little things at the doorstep of the house he's staying in. They're small trinkets, with no notes attached -- nothing that would take away from the memories they're supposed to bring back. Sometimes it's a soft pink piece of fabric, or a little figurine of a princess, or dried flowers, or a half-used chapstick.

She hopes it helps. ]

[casperdisaster]

[All the trinkets do eventually find their way to his room, lining shelves like little treasures to be displayed. Sometimes they help him remember. Sometimes they just make him sad, and then he stops being Noah for a while.

He always rights them again if he comes back to himself and finds them knocked down, though.

Remembering is difficult when he's dead. He's a static image repeating over and over again with minor variations before returning back to what he was. He's not sure if having a body changed that, really. Adam said it did, so Adam must know. Noah leaves a note with Adam to remind him to talk to Arya again when he's alive.

Even if he can't remember his own sisters, the trinkets have other meanings. That she cared enough to remember what he lost.]

Text

[cowardley]

Hey. I don't want to be a bother, but... Is everything all right? You've kind of gotten quiet. Not that it's a bad thing, or anything, I'm just a little worried, I guess.

[ Do you have any idea how many times she rewrote that? Gosh, she's such a worry wart. ]

Text

[casperdisaster]

[the reply, of course, comes a little later than he had gotten in the habit of. Unless he was sleeping, he had generally replied to Ashley quickly, no matter how off the wall or inane the text. For the last couple weeks though, he'd slowed significantly, leaving hours or days in between replies. He knew it was probably too much to hope that she didn't notice, but that had never stopped Noah in the past.]

I don't want to jinx it and make things worse, but... things have kinda gone tits up around here lately. Sorry, I didn't say anything because I didn't want to worry you.

['Around here' almost certainly meaning where he lives and his insular friends group of people from home he would have definitely mentioned - Adam, Ronan and Gansey.]

Text

[cowardley]

Is there anything I can do? [ The possibilities are endless as to what's occurred, and she wants to pry, but refrains. If he's having problems, he's likely keeping them within his group of close friends. ] I mean, if there is, don't hesitate to ask. I'm here.

[ even if it's just through the phone. ]

Text

[casperdisaster]

[He should probably tell her about the dead thing. He's not sure how much longer it'll last, but it's been long enough for her to notice now. She should probably know why.

He doesn't want to freak her out. It is probably news you give in person too.]

Thank you. Um, are you busy? Talking in person might be easier, if you have the time.

[He doesn't have to combat with a touchscreen then.]

text

[greywaren]

I don't know where the fuck your ghostly ass is but Adam is gone. Buried I think.

Tell me you can use a shovel.

Text

[casperdisaster]

I can use a shovel.

I can't tell which is him, though. They all feel the same.

Text

[greywaren]

fuck

Are you sure? Even with cabeswater?

Text

[casperdisaster]

Yes. I don't know what's wrong. It's all... muddled up. Like when a compass can't find north because there's too many magnets or something.

text

[unknowable]

Noah, you little shit, do you think you could get off your lazy ass and take Aspen for a walk?

text

[unknowable]

??? what is this?

Noah I'm sorry I didn't type that.

text

[casperdisaster]

... so ... does this mean I don't get to take the dog for a walk or ... ?

text

[unknowable]

You can. I really didn't mean to say anything like that to you, though. Even if you are a little bitch.

text.

[kickingand]

you busy?

text.

[casperdisaster]

no. you need something?

text.

[kickingand]

i might yeah